The Rules
October 28, 2006
October 27, 2006
October 26, 2006
October 19, 2006
October 18, 2006
October 17, 2006
October 16, 2006
October 15, 2006
October 14, 2006
NEWS FLASH! DEATH IN CONFER STARTS STRING OF MURDERS
The rising body toll across campus has authorities scrambling to uncover the motives as, particularly in Prairie View, the corpses begin to pile up. And smell.
The first murder occurred in Confer, at the foot of the staircase between the bathroom and room 128. The victim was found with a wet shot to the head at approximately 8:45PM. Authorities were rather ticked off by the fact that Anime Club members Tim Fontana and Seth Calvert took it upon themselves to carry the body like a sack of potatoes into Confer 128. Quote one S&S officer; "...and then they stabbed her to make sure she was dead. It's safe to say she definitely died around that time."
Suspicions as to some sort of sick sick cult serial killing were raised when at approximately 10:45PM the body of Anime Club's notorious call girl was found, quietly stabbed in the back, during the middle of an Al Gore movie.
Unlucky stars converged upon one would-be murderer. Unlucky stars to the back of the head, with stabbing. Reports grieved friend Sariha; "She invited me over for a party. She just went to use the computer. Then she was stabbed. It's really quite sad."
Shortly thereafter, a young man was tragically knifed in the back on his way back from the Caf. In another area of campus, a knife fight between a scary man in camo and an unidentified man with a beard took place. Quote one witness: "It was like evil Waldo was tryin' to kill G.I Joe, man. It was just crazy, man. Man, is that a blue card? Oh, maaaan!" Authorities were not willing to comment upon the validity of this witness' testimony, especially in light of the fact that another witness claimed there were no witnesses.
Then, in quick succession, a slaughter in quiet little Prairie View, the dorm known for its anti-social crazies and lack of a prairie view:
A door knock and a gun shot resounded at the same instant that an Akabane impersonation (that man in the pretty hat with the shiny knives pictured above) lead to a fatal spear-induced stabbing. Later, the corpse was reputed to have died again as his hand touched down on door-based contact poison. Overkill? This reporter thinks not.
A gun fight followed by a stand-off in the entryway of Prairie View ended tragically and after much delay-via-truce in the death of yet another poor trusting sap. But not before the sap stabbed her CF in the back after claiming a craving for candy.
She never did get the candy.
Saftey and Security reports that soon thereafter, a group composed of two rotting filthy corpses and three malicious mal-doers was spotted patrolling in and around the IC area.
When, oh when will this mayhem end?
Probably after 13 or so more deaths, this reporter thinks. Call it a hunch.
~ The Classifieds ~
Natalie & Allison's Weapon-Making and Letter-Opening Service
Grand opening! A once-in-a-lifetime chance to acquire once-in-a-deathtime happiness!
These corpse-like individuals will gladly turn your raw materials into serial-killing machines.
Also, their new and improved letter-opening service takes the "explosion" out of "letters from Mom"!
Prairie View 124
#6615